At times, more often than any of us who've been through weight loss of any proportion would like to admit, there is always some sort of struggle. It can be mental, physical, emotional, or a combo of the three.
Personally, even in maintenance, I've seen my share of the three. It will always be there, and I can only do my best to not let it get the best of me.
However, there is something I still struggle with to this day: accepting compliments!
Yes, I still don't believe that people actually say nice things about me. Anywhere. Anytime.
For example, I remember when we got audited at work in March, and the manager we were training told me that the auditor said I blew them away (in a good way, of course). My response: "I did?" Yup, the little bit of doubt popped into my head, and negated what was something that should have been awesome to hear.
Another time was when I raced the George Sheehan Classic 5K back in June and had my worst race ever. People were telling me that I did a good job for finishing a tough race in hot and humid conditions, but all I saw was my time, and kept coming down on myself for being as slow as I was. Plus, all the time in the gym and the few occasions I go out, people keep telling me I look good. I say "Thanks," but really think to myself "Okay..." Again, self-doubt popping into my head. I've come to the conclusion that I am my own worst enemy. I have more self-doubt and come down on myself so hard that it's crazy. In a way, that is a good thing. I come down on myself for stuff that I know I can do better, and as a result, have gotten stronger, at least a little. But for the most part, it just gets in the way.
I found this quote on Pinterest, and I think it pretty much says it all.
I need to love (and stop underestimating) myself before I can see the love that the rest of the world has for me. Well, the part of the world that matters. ;-)
I'm starting to get better with the self-love. A week or two ago, I wore a top that wasn't too loose to the gym, and felt AMAZING in it! I even took a mirror pic (which I normally hate, for other reasons) to show how happy I felt!
Now I just need to work on that more of the time!
I won't be perfect with this, but I can keep moving forward and love myself more. The more I love myself, the more that I can see the love everyone else has for me.
I'm actually thinking of making that a challenge in September (again). I found one on Pinterest (of course), and plan on rocking it! More details on that to follow!
For tonight, I will end with a positive self-affirmation: I am amazing. I have done awesome things. I love myself for all that I am.
How about YOU? Do you struggle with accepting compliments?
Happy Friday Eve, everybody! This week seemed to fly, which is unusual for me! Since it's Thursday, and I forgot to post a playlist last week (silly real life getting in the way), here's one for you this week!
I can't thank Pavey enough for putting this idea in my head and I've gone with it for a few weeks now! I love putting these together!
For those unfamiliar with Playlist Thursday (either through here or Pavey), here's the format:
Something Old: Songs that are at least 5 years old. (I know that isn’t too long to be considered old, but music turnover happens quickly.) Something Current: Songs that have been released within the past year. Something to Consider: This is the wild card category. Feel free to list any song: old, current, guilty pleasure, underground, whatever.
Here's what I came up with:
Something Old
Artist: Coldplay Song: White Shadows Side Note: Some people say that this song is underrated, which I kind of agree with. However, I'm kind of glad this song never hit the radio in the United States (It did in Australia, Italy, and Mexico). It made for a nice treat for those who bought the whole X&Y album. Everything about this song screams Coldplay, and it is awesome. Personally, I feel that this song is about recognizing things that you didn't know were there or that you wanted, and acting upon that realization. You may not get them, but at least you know what you're going for. Quotable:Little white shadows glisten, part of a system plan.
Something Current
Artist: Florence and the Machine Song: Queen of Peace Side Note: The whole album How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful is awesome, but this song was my favorite from the time I first heard the album. The message is not the happiest, since it's pretty much about the girl being "the queen" trying to make everyone happy and the guy being "the king" ruining everything and driving everyone away. The song is catchy yet powerful, like much of the band's songs, and part of the reason I have become a Florence and the Machine fan! Quotable:Like the stars chase the sun over the glowing hill, I will conquer.
(Note: I couldn't find a vid with only Queen of Peace, so this is what you get...)
Something to Consider
Artist: Fun. Song: Carry On Side Note: I try to stay away from anything really mellow and sappy with these. However, this is a great song. It is a bit cliched, with the whole "Never give up" theme, but at the same time, it's typical Fun. The beginning starts with feeling empty and alone and ends with "No one's going to stop us now" bit. I love this song when I'm feeling down and know that I just need to realize that if I carry on, it will be fine. Quotable:'Cause we are, we are shining stars, we are invincible, we are who we are.
This week's playlist may come across as a mixed bag, and that's because it is. I couldn't decide on a theme for this week, so I just picked a few of my favs. Hopefully, I can come up with an awesome theme for next week!
Happy Birthday Eve to me! This time tomorrow, I'll be 30! Where has time gone? I seriously feel like I just turned 21! Wow. Since it's Thursday, it's time for another playlist! Pavey had some good ones, and after he randomly did one again, I decided to start my own!
Here's the format:
Something Old: Songs that are at least 5 years old. (I know that isn’t too long to be considered old, but music turnover happens quickly.) Something Current: Songs that have been released within the past year. Something to Consider: This is the wild card category. Feel free to list any song: old, current, guilty pleasure, underground, whatever.
Since tomorrow is my birthday, and I'll be in a new decade of life, I decided to make this week's playlist songs that reflected the crazy journey that my 20's took me on! Here's what I came up with:
Something Old
Artist: Bon Jovi Song:Everyday Side Note: You knew Bon Jovi was coming in a matter of time. I am from Jersey after all! I just realized this song was released my junior year of high school. Talk about feeling old. ;-) This is an awesome song though. The message of the song as a whole is having enough of living in the past and feeling like crap. Basically, living life every day as full as possible! I would have never done that if I was still overweight. I plan on embracing it even more in my 30's! Quotable: Life, learning how to live my life, learning how to pick my fights, take my shots while I'm still burning.
Something Current
Artist: OneRepublic Song: I Lived Side Note: This is probably my favorite song on OneRepublic's album "Native." It is a catchy, yet emotional song. The message of the song is to live (or have lived) with no regrets, and nobody wants to have regrets. I run to this song all the time, and it makes me want to give it my all when I'm on the road. It was also the last song on Glee, and it was a fitting one too. I feel like this song spoke volumes about my 20's. While I struggled, I still gave everything I had, and even did some stuff that I never thought would have been possible. Quotable:The only way you can know, give it all you have.
Something to Consider
Artist: Jordin Sparks Song: One Step at a Time Side Note: Another one you had to see coming...haha. Jordin was the American Idol winner in 2007, and was my favorite that season. This song was actually her second single, and was the song that started it all for me. I try to take life one step at a time, although I'm still a work in progress with this. Still, taking everything one step at a time more often than not got me to where I am today! I actually had that mantra custom made on a Momentum Jewelry wrap bracelet as a constant reminder. Quotable:It's gonna happen when it's supposed to happen, that we find the reasons why, one step at a time.
There you have it! Three songs that defined my 20's and the crazy ride the decade took me on! Here's to making my 30's rock!
I still can't believe it's August already. In three days, I'll be 30 years old too. Wow.
Well, since we're into August now, guess I should recap July.
Here was what I set out to do:
Here's how I did:
1) Apply #wycwyc into my life more. I did really well with this. I wasn't perfect, but I found myself wick-wick'ing a lot more than I used to. I think this will stick. #wycwyc still feels better than nothing!
2) Create a training plan for my October races. Well, October is starting early. I signed up for a 5K on September 13, and actually decided to go week-by-week with the training plans. My schedule at work may be changing, and I don't want to have two months of plans that may not work even close to 100%. Plus, honestly, trying to plan two months out was driving me crazy. Still, I'm in the right direction.
3) Try one new recipe. FAIL! I swear, summer is the worst time of year to cook. I got so lazy and didn't do much in the kitchen. Just my own laziness to blame here. Meh.
4) Comment on five blog posts a week. NAILED IT! I love catching up on my friends' blogs and interacting with them and other readers. Maybe this will stay a habit? I hope so!
5) Place $50 into savings. Yeah, did not happen. I got $25 in, then spent what I had in savings at the Liberty game on Sunday. Plus, money was tight, and I didn't get to save. Hopefully, after the summer ends, I'll get back on track!
So, I didn't buy my new sheets since the month was less than spectacular. However, I am happy with the progress I made and hoping some of these will stick through the rest of the summer and into the fall!
I am actually stepping back from monthly goals for August. Change is happening at work, and I don't want to drive myself too crazy with that and the goals for the month. I don't want to get into specifics with work right now, since the process hasn't started yet, but I can say that this is something I feel I'm ready for and will be for the better.
