This is a post I've been meaning to write for some time, but not exactly in this format.
However, in the post-Fitbloggin span of about two weeks, I've been seeing a lot of "tough love" posts. Basically, as bloggers (and friends), we can be a little too easy on each other, and not push as much as we know we should, which in turn, lets us keep living in a bubble of "It's okay." Truth is, it's not always okay, and we need to call ourselves out on crap.
Recently, I came down with a huge case of "Keeping Up with the Joneses" syndrome. In a nutshell, I spend a lot of time comparing myself to others and feel like my life is an epic fail because I'm 29 (almost), not married with kids, still living with my family, and not having a "real job." Oh, and not to mention the fact that I didn't go from couch potato to marathoner in a blink of an eye. Yes, I know things can always be worse, but I was in a mindset of "I'm already at the bottom. There's nowhere else to go." Not exactly what I want to be thinking.
My friend Dani of Weight off My Shoulders wrote an awesome post about this some time ago (which you can read here). The whole point of the post was that everyone has their own journey, and we just have to live our own. I reread it yesterday and realized that I needed to call myself out on this big time because I'm not doing that at all.
So, here's to showing myself some tough love!
Dear Tracy,
You've been spending a lot of time comparing yourself to everyone else around you, right? I thought so.
You think that because you don't have a real job or a marriage and kids, and still live with your parents, your life is an epic fail at almost 29, right?
Well, guess what? IT'S NOT!!
Epic failure would be not having any sort of job AT ALL! At least you have some way to make money to pay your bills and feed yourself! Yes, times are tough, but there are people who don't have any sort of job! Be thankful you have one, even if you're asking people if French baguette is okay with their meal!
So what if you still live with your parents? Do you have a roof over your head? A warm bed at night? Yes on both? Good! Then, you can't say that you have nothing. You have someone who cares enough about you to let you stay with them!
Oh, and this whole thing about not being married with kids at 29? So what? Those people were ready! You weren't! You still had to focus on yourself!
Speaking of which, you are a ROCKSTAR just for doing what you did by losing over 100 pounds and still keeping it off! Honey, there are people who would LOVE to do what you did and are still doing!
Are you getting it now? You are? Good.
The whole point is that no two people live the same life!
Our journeys are all so different, and we need to follow our own in the best way for OURSELVES. Comparing yourself to everyone else won't do that.
Yes, I know it's so easy to get wrapped up in trying to keep up with everyone else, but really, at the end of the day, the only person who matters is YOU!
I mean, really, would you have lost over 100 pounds if you didn't love yourself? NO WAY! That alone says a lot!
So, instead of saying "I'm not as good as everyone else," try saying "Why would I want to be like someone else? I can be a kick-ass version of myself and love it!"
I needed to get this out for a long time and already I feel better about myself.
Physically, I'm the best I've been in a long time. I've completed two 5K's this year, and planning at least two more. Mentally, I'm in a much better place than I was. I love myself and realize that if I had the same life as everyone else, that would be boring.
So, I've decided to stop dwelling on everyone else, stop trying to keep up, and remember that I am the only person that matters at the end of the day!
I mean, isn't it all about taking life one step at a time? No matter how long it takes, it's still a step!
I know I'll get to where I'm meant to be, but for right now, it's about letting it fall into place, enjoying the ride, and being that kick-ass version of myself without worrying about other people!
After all, success is a JOURNEY, not a DESTINATION!
Love this post. I've been having a lot of the "you only have one life" thoughts, so why wish it away? Enjoy the moments and be happy with who you are, not what you "wish" you were.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing Tracy.
So true! I realize that I needed this time to fix myself and that things can be a lot worse! Worrying about everyone else just wastes my energy that I can be using to make me the best version of me! I've been a thousand times happier since I put this post up!
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