Monday, September 27, 2010

Experiencing a struggle...

Hey, guys! Sorry I haven't written in awhile, I've been pretty busy!

I decided to write an entry tonight without any numbers or other cliche weight loss info, because I am keeping this real and want to write about my journey from the heart, not just the stats.

This is something that I have been kind of afraid to admit until now: I am still struggling with self-esteem, maybe a little more so before I started losing weight. When I was almost 250 pounds, I really didn't love myself. I loved everyone else more than me, which is what I think lead me to the self-destructive path I was on.

In a year, I have lost almost 60 pounds. Sure, it feels great and all, but honestly, I feel like I got almost nowhere. I'm still in the "obese" portion of the charts, and still can't shop in any of the good stores. I spend MORE time crying now than I did before, and I'm still struggling with loving myself 100%. 

For the record, I do love myself. Otherwise, who knows how much more weight I would have gained. I just struggle with loving myself 100% like I should. I will get there though. It's just a matter of time.

Thank you everyone for your love and support! :-)